Puppy, it was just my statement that I had talked to an attorney. Not trying to imply to her that I was going to initiate anything. More like if she pushes for the seperation or divorce, then I will do what I have to. And at this point, I have every intention of following through.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
Just so everyone on the board understands ---My appointment with the attorney wasn't a bluff. I was ready to follow through, still am if she screws up again. PRAYING she won't, because I don't want a D.
I would never threaten a D if I wasn't ready to follow through. That is one bluff you don't want called. Once WS calls that bluff, and you don't go through with it, you are sunk for sure.
Understood, gentlemen. I have never threatened a D, and have always told her that if she wants a D, then it will have to be her to do it as I will not go against what I believe is Gods wishes. The last couple of times that she threw out the D word, I calmly informed her that I will fight for custody of the girls. I also told her that that is not what I want to do, but I will protect us from her bad decisions. Our last discussion, she threw out that she will start the process and the part that I have already talked to an attorney just came out and nothing more was said after that.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
WW is maintaining her NC, I THINK. I am doing my best to verify. As sad as it is, any glimmer of niceness, hope, a smile, laugh, not wearing sweat pants, using an exclamation point in an email, etc. drives me nuts. I automatically think something is up...Contact must have been made. Just have to remind myself to detach, detach, detach. 'Trust, but verify' as my friend says.
We have a MC session tomorrow, our first. I can't wait. My expectations are remaining low, but I am hoping for the best. I have no idea what to really expect, or how it will work.
Interestingly, my WW is being pretty active about looking for a job. I think this is a good thing, but it makes you wonder.... Is she just getting ready for life on her own? Or trying to fill a void in her life, or do something so she doesn't have to constantly think about OM? Maybe this is a good question to ask in MC.
My days are getting better and better. Getting back into work, life, friends, etc. GAL-ing big time. Honestly, I feel as good as I have felt in YEARS. Maybe 10 years. Maybe more. Feels great to be right and whole again.
LOL -- that didn't come out in my writing like I meant it.
What I MEANT was that instead of her wearing the typical sweatpants or lounge-around-the-house clothes, she looked nice yesterday. Nice jeans, shirt, etc. When she looks cleaned up and nice, I suspect the worst... you know what I mean.
LOL. I know what you mean, but don't forget. Your dealing with people here who may not have been intimate with anyone for a long time. For some of us, a long time. My first thought was she was giving you the cruel and unusual punishment by walking around the house without pants on top of everything else. Too funny!
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
WW is maintaining her NC, I THINK. I am doing my best to verify. As sad as it is, any glimmer of niceness, hope, a smile, laugh, not wearing sweat pants, using an exclamation point in an email, etc. drives me nuts. I automatically think something is up...Contact must have been made. Just have to remind myself to detach, detach, detach. 'Trust, but verify' as my friend says.
Interestingly, my WW is being pretty active about looking for a job. I think this is a good thing, but it makes you wonder.... Is she just getting ready for life on her own? Or trying to fill a void in her life, or do something so she doesn't have to constantly think about OM? Maybe this is a good question to ask in MC.
That's the part I have the hardest time with DMB. If I ever get to the point where she's actually TRYING to work on the marriage, I'll always be worried there are other motives. I've experienced those very things twice now and each time it was contact had been made. So now I'll be totally gun shy if she does start to respond to me. How sick is that? Deep down you like it better when she's pissy with you and looks like crap.
Keep it up. I'm glad you're feeling better. That will serve you well whatever the outcome.
Hope4Us.
Hope4us
Me - 49, W 49 S22 & S18 Dday 9/4/07 W claims NC 4/7/08 8/29/09 - Divorce Busted. Lots to work through, but we're going to make it.
