admittedly if she said that she was leaving i would feel a sense of loss again but i am not trying to push her away because i am afraid of her leaving.
i am so angry at the position she has placed us. i wish i could leave but i cannot bear the thought of hurting the children. i cannot stand the idea of taking turns with the children. i shudder when i imagine her having married again and another guy trying to play the role of a father to my kids.
i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i agree ellie, i am overwhelmed. nobody should have to go through what i, you, and everyone else who has had a spouse betray them, have gone through. i am disgusted by what my sometimes wife has done to me and our family.
she is going to collect unemployment until she can find a job.
i don't want her to try to fill my "love tank." i feel like she had that chance and blew it.
today is also the annaversary of when i found out...
why am i being so pussyfooted about this? it is simple: mess around on me and i leave. period. when did i change the rules? why should the rules be different now that i have children?
