The next day, Sam asked if I told her to pack up and leave just to be mean to her. I said, "No. I said it because I mean it." She then told me she doesn't want to leave and she wants our marriage to last.
I cannot tell her that I am afraid of her leaving again because I am not. I am certain she wants to stay, but I also feel if she left that would be fine too. I am not trying to push her away. I am just tired of all of it.
As far as my health goes, I will be taking measures to improve it. I can't help but wonder how much stress is a factor in my condition?
We received another surprise hit today: Sam is going to be unemployed after this Friday. That means we also lose our free daycare.
Folks...I'm looking for some good in this relationship and I am not finding any. I am lost right now. Ellie, I will support her as she finds new work. I still love her but I am finding it more and more difficult to come up with reasons to fight for this marriage.
