My H is like that too: often cold & detached. It's frustrating but I figure my H has to act like that or my warmth and magnetic personality would suck him in again (and he's trying hard to resist)! Maybe it's the same in your case, too!
Moving out may be a little drastic, and I do think it is better to live together to improve the chances of working on your R when you are living together (although I know how hard it is!!!).
Have you been doing a lot of GALing? Like the play I'm doing is at least 30 hours a week so gave me time & space away from H when he was living here (and now visiting the kids). Obviously, you don't have to do that, but more activities, sports, or hobbies that will get you out of the house and away from your H might be good. Karen
Maybe it's the same in your case, too! 
