#3 Did I find DB too late? Maybe not...

[cw68]

We're not back together, but we are solidly in the friendship stage. Friends with a little bit of benefits.

LMG, my H has always continued to say ILY, but he said he wasn't "in love" with me. A think a lot of our situation is that my H really didn't know what marriage was all about. His mom has three kids with three different fathers without relationships with them. I think her longest relationship in her life lasted two years. When he dropped the bomb, I asked him if he thought it was head-over-heels-in-love-forever and he said YES! He's only said the ILY on his own about ten times since he left, but whenever I say it (and it's not all the time), I always get a real ILY you back. Never a "I know you do" or mumbling ILY. I know he loves me. He just doesn't know if that love is enough, or if it's the kind of love that's enough forever.

When we were talking the other night I said that I believe that when the head-over-heels love leaves that's when the real love sets in, he said I may be right.

I'm beginning to believe more and more that it's not me he's fighting, but rather it's his unrealistic ideas of love that's a big part of it. His mom constantly talks about romantic love, soul mates and fireworks. Note she hasn't found it, which makes me believe more and more that romantic love is just for teenagers.