Doing ok today, bear with me, I'm a believer \:\) I think when one is doing fine and getting stronger is when the enemy tries to drag you down even harder, so I think this is what is happening, I was doing so well 2wks ago, and lately I've regressed to denial, NO! I dont' want to be in denial, I want to remember that H was FAR gone, when he was with me he had plenty of chances to make things right, but he was just miserable in our home, no matter how good I made things for him, until he fixes himself he'll always be miserable and unable to give.

I've asked myself, what I want? what kind of man Iwant for life? a man that is glad to see me, who thinks of me as his friend, who lovingly would caress my face and love me, faults and all. 4nowH is FAR FAR from that kind of person.

Crawling from rock bottom, God is great and has answer my pleas for help.

I'm a Shakira fan (she belly dances real good too \:\) ), just wanted to post partial lyrics to a song of hers that calls to me now:

Don't Bother

She's almost 6 feet tall
She must think I'm a flea
I'm really a cat you see
And it's not my last life at all

Hey hey

So don't bother
I won't die of deception
I promise you won't ever see me cry
Don't feel sorry

Don't bother
I'll be fine
But she's waiting
The ring you gave to her will lose its shine
So don't bother, be unkind

For you, I'd give up all I own
And move to a communist country
If you came with me, of course
And I'd file my nails so they don't hurt you
And lose those pounds, and learn about football
If it made you stay, but you won't, but you won't

So don't bother,
I'll be fine, I'll be fine, I'll be fine, I'll be fine
Promise you won't ever see me cry

And after all I'm glad that I'm not your type
Promise you won't ever see me cry

Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2

30something
2kids
survivor of S, MLC, A, D
I have peace in my heart, at last.