Well, W and I have exchanged texts about D's birthday party invite list. W's first text said D wanted to invite three of W's female friends and OM, but W referred to OM by the incorrect name like D does.
I replied asking for clarification and said I would appreciate it if OM was not at the party. W responded by telling me that "we all know" that OM is who D is talking about and W swears she's tried to correct her several times. W then blamed me for D doing this b/c I have nicknames for a few of my friends. I replied by restating I'd apprecate it if OM was not at the party.
W then said it was D's party and she could invite whomever she wished. She also claimed D told W that I wasn't invited by "mommy" so I wouldn't be at the party. I replied and said I'd always said I'd be there and I'd appreciate her being considerate and not inviting OM.
W's reponse said I'm calling D a liar and she stated that D was afraid to tell me anything b/c I'd get mad at her. She also accused me of teaching D to lie instead of being honest.
I replied saying she was 4 and confused and the parenting evaluator had spoken to us about this. W asked "about what" and I said how we shouldn't take stock into what D is saying as it is not lying but rather normal behavior for a child her age in her situation.
W didn't respond to this text, but she did make a comment again that D can invite anyone she wants to the party. She stated that OM doesn't have to come, but D can put him on the guest list if she wants to. I responded by saying I'd never said he couldn't be invited, but I'm asking that he not attend to be considerate. W hasn't responded to this one either.
Did I tell her too much? Should I not have balked at OM coming? I know the books say to not discuss it, but don't they also say I need to stand up for myself as well? I've been careful to keep my responses to W very short and on subject. If she wants to try and escalate this into an argument, I'm done.
I've addressed my concern and I'm done. However, I would like to hear what you think about this exchange. I think I did ok, but I'm not sure if I should have mentioned OM being there at all. Honestly, I'm not sure I'm strong enough to see him and W together, especially at my D's birthday party.
Oh, well. I'll keep you posted if more comes in and I'll appreciate your comments as always.
