I am sorry you are having difficulties. Until you have been able to work through the sexual issues I would consider stopping the masterbating and porn. Have you tried just having sexual talk with her. Meaning you talk about what things you like sexually to be done to you and have her do the same just to open up the communication about sex and will also give you both some insight into how to pleasure eachother. Also you can just try some sexual games that you can get either online or at a store. The game does not have to end in intercourse and your issue may be that you feel pressure to perform sexually. So maybe the two of you could just work on foreplay and not so much on actually having sex. This will allow both of you to start to feel more comfortable with eachother and will also help you to see her as a sexual being. The more you practice at just making out and touching over time you may feel like actually having sex. It sounds like this is an issue that will take practice for you but maybe if you stop pleasuring yourself it will be easier to interact with your wife sexually. Also try fantasizing about your wife. It may feel uncomfotable for a while but keep at it. Maybe if you really want to masterbate wait until you are very turned on and you are almost finished, have her come in the room. The more you involve her in your mind sexually the easier it will be for you to see her as a sexual being and then it will be easier to be attracted sexaully to her. I hope I have helped you out some. Good luck.
