check this out guys. please read above at my successful db'ing today. After I got home for lawyers office, I "acted as if" and (at one point this week in an argument when he was pressuring me to sign sep. papers, he said that I could have daughter (5 years old during the week in our current home and he would have her on weekend.
My lawyer said i should DEF. stay in the house. And if h is insisting on going out "2 nights a week" -- let him. don't argue, beg or reason with him. my lawyer is actually very db.
So when i got home I acted as if we are seperated (remember I took over guest room took out all my stuff, h totally noticed and asked why I did that. He also didn't know where I went today and I didn't offer an ounce of info, but was respectful and db'd. SO, he was painting our house today and at one point he comes into my room (I was trying to take a nap after not sleeping the 2 nights he has been with ow). he asked if I could take daughter to the park because she was following him around while he wsa painting (she missed him SO much past couple of days) and I very nicely said, "look when (if) we separate, I'm not going to be around to watch her. It's important that you spend time with her on the weekends because she loves you so much. Maybe you might want to consider taking her to the park -- she would love that". I said this in such a db way. This was actually advice I got from my lawyer, that he has to begin feeling what the ramifications will really be like and what life will be like if he follows through on sep/splitting up. I was very, very kind when I said this. he just kind of stood there and said, "you're right, ok". So I without guilt db'd and took a well-deserved nap!
THEN out of nowhere (about 10 minutes ago), he comes up to me and in the most sincere voice said, "Mary, I'm so sorry I've disrespectful to you". And then he kissed my cheek. We hugged for a long time and I just, "thank you for saying that, it's ok, I'm fine". He then kissed me on the cheek again. I did a "mini db backslide" for asking for a kiss on the lips and he just looked down (like ashamed or something) and said, "I don't think it would be right", but then he did it anyway.
