I know that the guy she's going to Spain with is OM because she told me his nationality and the guy's name is definitely from that country. He shares the surname with someone else that he can get cheap flights for - when she came to see me last week I was with her when she logged into her airline account and memorized her user ID and password. I saw everything that I needed to. She will be upset that I looked at it but it's a password I could easily have guessed.
So yes, I am left in no doubt. The thing I don't get is that she has made all of these overtures to come back i.e. moving things back into the apartment. I asked her if she had told OM about moving her stuff back and she said "no, not yet". I know that OM has found her in doubt about them and she didn't want to talk to him about it. It seems to have all the characteristics of an affair i.e. deception on both sides.
I think the best thing to do is to wait it out. If and when she comes I will provide a safe and non-judgmental environment for her to talk and then I will know whether she is lying. I'll have to think of another course of action by then, but if she vacillates further then I will go back to Australia and lovingly ask for a cessation of all contact until she knows. The situation is that I have very little contact with her anyway other than email so I don't know what other options are available. I could call her on OM's number now that I have it but that would also make her extremely defensive and take me further from my goal. Ooooh the anger!
Really appreciate your help guys. Do give me more tips if you have them.
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
