Water, You're not the only one has ever gone anti-DB on their sitch! We've all done it. After all, we're only human, not super human, and the situations we're in are so complicated. Don't beat yourself up.
I also went into the pursuing/calling in a panic mode when I couldn't reach H. It's like some alien takes over your mind and once it gets going, you just can't stop ... you can't stop your thoughts or your actions. So many times I remember telling myself, DON'T CALL, YOU WILL NOT CALL, DON'T CALL, YOU WILL NOT CALL, but most of the time I did.
If it was for naught, I would apologize to my H. I would explain why I did what I did, he always seemed to understand. If your H understands, too, he will try to call you when he can. And certainly in his type of job, he will not be able to respond to you so be prepared for that.
Come and post here when that alien tries to overtake you! However, if it's in the middle of the night, there may not be any one here, except for the folks over in the UK, perhaps!
Again, just apologize to your H -- but don't overdo it. And don't beat yourself up over it. Forgive yourself and move on!
