Do you want to live with this deceit? Personally I would call her on it. If your M is to have a chance she should be completely open and transparent. Maybe you shouldn't start off with telling her you know about the weekend - maybe you could just ask her to begin with if she has ceased contact with OM and what she intends to be doing until she comes back to you. You haven't got long to stop her going with OM if that is what you intend to do.
How exactly did you find out all these details? do you know how long ago this weekend jaunt was booked? Maybe she is going on the trip in order to tell him the bad news and she didn't want to tell you as she though that it would upset you. Going into this with secrets on one side and snooping on the other doesn't feel right to me. Piecing a M back together is hard work even when both parties are fully committed - your W needs to understand that.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
