So, if your daughter was married for 24 yrs and he was still attacking her, it would be ok then? You would tell her what you are telling yourself, "Its not about you, honey, its about his demons". Does your D know your H has hurt you in the past? That is something she will never forget. Oh TOH, please don't believe that about yourself, that you should accept his behavior. Its never changed. He should have called the police and had you arrested if you were on his property, making threats. Bottom line.
This summer, when H confessed his A to me, and we were fighting, I was so angry, I wanted to attack him. I walked out of the room, went to the bathroom and kicked the shower door in, knocking both doors off the track. I was shocked at my rage, it scared me. But even in my depths of anger, I knew it was wrong to attack a person.
One time of violence in a marriage is awful enough. But this has continued. Would it be ok if your number of violence stayed under 20? Under 30? What's the limit?
I stick with my thoughts that he is playing nice because he knows you can have him arrested. When else is he nice other than to get something he wants from you?
Quote:
I am a strong woman
Yes, you are. So much more than you realize. But what does your H see? What do YOU see when its quiet at night and you have time to reflect?
