You don't understand I really don't give a d*mb how she feels or what she thinks. But if my H and I get D and he stays with her, she does win. She set out to break up our M, our F, and take my H for her own and that is what is happening. SHE will get to grow old with him, SHE will get to laugh with him, SHE will get to cry with him, SHE will get to share in his future, SHE will get to spend the rest of her days with him. NOt ME. IF he was such a total ass, mean, abusive, etc...this would not matter to me. I could let him go. But it is not who he is inside. Just what he is at this time thanks to her, or the affair, or his job, or his childhood trama, or MLC, or what ever the hell it is that has destroyed us both.
This sounds like a competition that no one wants to admit defeat.
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He won't do this again.
He's repeated this behavior over and over. What makes it different now?
TOH, as everyone has said (at least here, not sure about your other board), take the focus off your H, ow, if he calls, if he doesn't call, what he says, what he doesn't say.....
When your H looks back at you to see what he is leaving behind - what is he seeing? Maybe he is the kinda guy that likes to see women scrapping with each other, maybe that really turns him on, maybe that makes him fall in love. You have physically gone after ow twice in the last few weeks. What's your next move?
It isn't just your H that needs help, you need anger management to get yourself under control before you get locked up.
Now your H calls all sweet as pie and you're sucking it all up- because you can't be a b*tch? Wait a minute! Nothing is changing. This is the same pattern. Change it.
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I am a strong woman.
A strong woman will not get in fights and get sucked in to sweet pie talks. Rise above it TOH.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
