I know this is so hard for you, confusing but if you do not want a D then give it a chance, you will know when you have had enough and only you, no one else can change how you feel. I am so sorry that I let some people know what was going on, because they told me I was crazy for putting up with the things I was putting up with, it's so easy for people to say you don't need this, file for D, leave him, etc. It is so different when you are going through it. My uncle did the same thing to my aunt that has happened to me, and at the time I said I would never ever put up with that S*** from my H. (then again I never thought I would have to.) But look at how much I put up with, unbelieveable. Love is a strange thing. I feel lucky that things are starting to get back to somewhat normal, but I am so afraid to let my guard down, &open my heart totally, & be me totally(I actually don't know who I am anymore at least I feel that way sometimes) I think its worth it for you to keep db'ing if you still want your m to work and you still love your W. Do everything you can do to make it work till you know you can absolutly do no more, then you can honestly say to yourself that you did everything possible & you won't have to wonder if you made a mistake or wrong discission. Take care. PS. I hate the whole cell phone thing, I wish I could flush my H. & I could kick myself I am the one who brought it for him. I still wonder about it when it rings or there is a message. I try not to ask I am getting good at it. And the bill comes in my name that is how I figured out what was going on, I am getting good at not opening the bill too, all the snooping even though I felt the need to know, made me feel so much worse. Have a good night ~~K~~
