H: I haven't talked to you in a while I was getting worried about you. (jokingly) I have been calling all the hospitals. M: I am fine. I have just been really busy. H: Well you know you should come and hang out. We are supposed to be friends and you have a daughter you haven't seen (our dog). I rented some movies if you would like to borrow them (strange since 2 of the 3 are movies I would never pick out for myself). M: Sure that would be nice maybe I can stop by. Would you like anything for dinner...
that all sounds really good to me...sounds like he really wanted to see you.
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1. He was telling me about benefits that I can recieve as the spouse of a veteran (I guess he initially forgot that I am a vet also. Then he caught himself, but then continued to tell me). 2. He told me that he would be needing some help with the bills due to the fact that he will have some down time between his end of service in the Navy and the CHP Academy (this is 7-9 months from now and he is expecting me to be around).
I don't understand this either. Spouse of a veteran and needing help with bills in the future sounds like R/M stuff to me. Especially saying spouse of vet, does that mean u2 are M? Men are solution oriented, so he is probably just working through his Navy stuff and finding answers to things on his mind. I don't mean this ugly, but when I first read it it sounded like a woman that worries to much. Like you said 7-9 months from now is a long time.
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He isn't treating me like a friend with all of his expectations. I don't know how to handle it. Something for my coach to tackle. I think part of it is that it is an old habit to lean on me
I think you have hit it on the head here. I think you keep doing what you are doing though. It is not negative right? Is it working? Progress? I think that something you should be careful about is that leaning thing. I am curious if my W has been nice to me at certain times, just to use me for what she wants. Like get 5D on Easter, which was my day. I don't think she has, but be careful not to be the doormat, the post to lean on, etc...while he digs out the foundation from under you. It's really hard. I know, because I do what I want to do, for her, 5D, etc but at the same time...I really don't think either of our spouses would/are doing this consciously, if at all...but something to just keep in mind.
gl2u..wish me luck with DB coach this evening, gonna do brief timeline/summary from Easterish to present...I am really looking forward to it. Work really stunk this morning, until I fired back...then bosses all nice. They really dropped ball last week and they know they did me wrong. Sounds like R stuff, lmao.
