Mary - sent you mail but wanted to post part of it here in case others have ideas. I think it's really important that you have an action plan for how you're going to handle tonight, since you know it will be hard. Envision how the Mary that you WANT to be would act - I assume that would be a strong, happy, calm, relaxed person, right? (as opposed to crying, begging, pleading, desparate..). Then act 'as if' and be that person.
So given that - I wanted to suggest an "action plan" to you for tonight since your H will be gone and I know it's upsetting you:
1. Move into your space, wherever you decide that is. Make it so you literally don't need to go back into 'his' room for anything (move all your clothes, toiletries, etc.)
2. Find something fun to do with your daughter. Go out to dinner and/or a movie or something, or make it 'girls night' and do each others' nails. Something like that.
3. If you have time.. do some decorating to make the room your own, even if it's just rearranging things and hanging up a few pictures. Make it a space that you love and feel peaceful in. At a minimum, get yourself some fresh flowers for your space (if you like flowers). Do you have a friend who might even come over and help you?
4. Think of what REALLY relaxes you and plan to do it. Bubble bath and candles, reading a book, whatever it may be. If it isn't working, do something active for awhile to help get yourself tired, then go back to the relaxing activity.
Hope that helps.. anyone else have suggestions?
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
