I'll chime in with everyone else, THIS IS NOT YOU. He's bound to fault anything, everything. He's excusing himself to no end, victim to everyone. First he was a victim of OW, hated being there, wanted to come home, was miserable. Now, he's still not happy, so it's being placed on you.
Please be careful - that comment about "something happening that will hurt everyone" scares me. Just be safe and watch yourself when he drinks.
Also, keep an eye on the money. I say that only b/c he might go on a spending spree and I would hate to see you all hurting from that.
