Letter from WAW after she flew to my city for talk

[GH31]

Hi guys,

Bit of an update to my situation. My WAW sent me this email at lunchtime which came somewhat out of the blue:

Hi GH31,

I need to confirm that you are definately committed to work on our future together.

Do you still feel the same? You have to be 100% sure.

I only want to get back together if you can asure me that you have changed for the better. I don' t want any repeats of before.

It's a big move to take a chance on you again, I don't want to be disappointed again. I want a beautiful life.

W

I was encouraged to get this email from her so I sent the following one in return:

Hi W,

Thank you for your email. I read it just after I sent the last one to you.

The answer on both counts is yes - in many areas and not just those relating to you and I.

I couldn't ever be the same again after going through the last 2 and a half months. I would like to say also that I empathise with your feelings of tentativeness and caution about the future, and wariness about repeats of before. I have identified many areas where I was just plain wrong and misguided.

I want a beautiful life too, and realised a while ago that I would never really have one unless I made and continue to make the necessary changes to my own life. Whatever happens, I thank you for initiating this separation as I would not have woken up to the reality otherwise and taken the necessary measures. I will be a better human being as a result of it all.

I have credit on my Skype account - you're welcome to call me if you wish and if it's an opportune time for you; some of this is difficult to articulate using the written word. You have my business card.

best,

GH31

She did call me at work and we had a short chat. She was upset as it was her birthday yesterday and she had had a bad day. I asked her what she ended up doing but she didn't want to discuss it and I didn't push her. She did want to say that she really loved the birthday card that I had bought her. I saw it when I was in England two weeks ago for an interview and knew that she would love it so I bought it anyway. It really was beautiful and an exact match to her taste. Then, when she visited last weekend I gave it to her to open on the day.

She said that she had received my email but was concerned that there were no words of affection in there and that that is what she wanted to hear. So I told her "my feelings haven't changed since the first day I laid eyes on you" and that "nothing would give me greater joy than to have my wife back in my life" and, "in spite of all that has happened your still my special little girl" etc. I also empathised with her reticence and tentativeness and concern for MOTS stuff.

So, she has said that she will move all of her stuff back in on April 14 (this coming Monday) and that we should go on a trip to the Baltic states.

What can I say? I am very encouraged by the direction of things though am still very cautious. I understand and accept that in spite of the good direction, it may be a false start. She did say 4 weeks ago that she would come back on April 4, so I am still unsure - but evidence seems to be coming up to indicate that she means business.

Also, I am not sure what this situation with OM is and I didn't ask.

I want to jump up and down with excitement though I do not think that this is the time. I think I will feel both relief and joy once the crisis stage of this odyssey is over but I think relief will probably win the day.

Eventually I hope to be able to post a success story here on the board but that will be a long way off, if in fact it does occur. I hope all of you are hanging in there and continuing to DB. It's really hard work but I can't imagine NOT doing whatever it takes to keep our marriages together.

Take care,

GH31