I think by GAL means something for yourself. It is good to do things with the W if she is willing and it is good to spend time with the kids without the W being around. But, you need something just for you!
Some books, like the Five Languages of Love (for example), I think is more for when the MR is more stable or at least in the "healing state".
You understand that "Love is a Decision", but your W is not in that frame of mind. I know I wasn't when I went through my personal crisis. It is a good book though.
There are so many good books out there, but Divorce Remedy really gives you the tools that you need to have right now! So read that book over and over.
I do agree with you about God and how He loves us, etc. You know God refers to Israel as His W, and the Israelites committed spiritual adultery more than once and God's discipline fell on them as a result. He did not like it at all!
It is true that we do not deserve to be loved by God and we can't do anything by good deeds or penance or anything to change God's love toward us. He never changes in spite of our mess ups. However, He too has boundaries that are described in the Bible.
We learn through our personal experience with God loving us and how the Bible teaches us to love others in like manner. However, when it comes to our own spouse.....the flesh is very weak and it is so hard! But...it can be done. Of all the books to read....the Bible is the best.
Unfortunately, your wife is not going to want to read anything you are reading or especially any quotes from the Bible. It is due to the frame of mind and her backsliding spiritual condition.
I wished I could talk longer, but I have got to get into bed.
Take care.
Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
