I'm Finally Ready to "Drop the Rope"

[fooled again]

Tipper,

Thanks for the pep talk - I do have more fight in me, but I'm choosing to walk away from the battle. Maybe if he figures out what he wants, then figures out what he is willing to do to have it, he will come to me and start talking. I'm done pursuing, I'm done waiting, I'm done shaping my life around him and hoping that this week, this month, this year he will choose to move back home and choose to work on this marriage. If he does, and it will take something significant to show me this is so, then I'll consider it. For now I've decided that I'm going to have a really fun spring & summer. That's as far ahead as I'm thinking.

The past two nights H has come over to see D and tuck her in. When he left, I was fully detached. It's like a switch has been flipped and now I AM detached, I'm no longer acting as if. As far as I'm concerned, he's not coming back. I'm not saying that months or years from now there would be no hope of reconciling, I'm just saying as of today, I'm stepping back and letting go. Whatever he does, he does and I don't care b/c it no longer involves me. He said he can't give me what I need; I said he won't. It doesn't matter anymore.

FA