Long periods (of meditation)is relative. I go for about 20 min in the am and (usually) 20 min at night. It's hard to quiet my mind sometimes and that's when I have the biggest problem moving forward and having any kind of peace.
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Dang Ginger, if you need some clarity, then I am totally screwed.
You are kidding right? I am constantly amazed by what you do (yes I read and re-read your threads).
You're doing the right thing, so to a certain extent who cares what the motivation is?
Man, do I feel sheepish (baaaaa). This is something I would say.
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You're over-analyzing this like a man!!!!
LOL and thanks??
((((Drew))))
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Don't overthink this. Just be. Do. Live.
Lightbulb moment. This reminds me of a triangle we use to use for meditation/visualization purposes. Being, doing, having.
I know all of this is in the attitude. Everything in life is really. I'm fortunate enough to have an instructor that reminds me of this twice a week. Even if he does push me till it hurts (why the hell am I doing split squats at my age...)
I think I should have titled this thread fall down on face instead of slippage.
D13 has really been struggling and today had a meltdown. H tried to talk to her and she shut down and wouldn't talk. She asked to go do something with just me, so we did. She's understandably angry and she drew a hard line which she later said she'd think about (all this was in talks with me only, not H). After we got home, I told H I'd like to talk with him later and he agreed (he was watching a moving with D16). Anyway, I was hungry so before I started cooking I said what I was planning on cooking and that they were welcome to join me if they didn't have other plans. H and D16 had started another movie and after supper I went into my room and was reading and then took a catnap. D16 came in to show me somthing and I was just laying on the bed when H came in and told her goodbye. I was thinking about how to best help D's with some of this mess and it took me a second to realize he was leaving. I asked D16 if he was leaving and she said yes so I hopped up in time to hear the door close. This is the fall on face moment...I said "idiot" outloud and D16 heard me. I can't believe I said that in front of her. I appologized to her and told her he isn't and that I was just frustrated. I've been kicking myself ever since. I know I need to let it go, but it's her Dad and that was beyond rude of me. I'm just so frustrated and I feel like I'm left to deal with all the raw emotions all alone. I've got an appointment for D13 to see a C next week. I need to find a way to get him involved by consulting with him re: D's. I get so damn mad that he won't step out of his a** and ask! I know better. Oh well, next week will present another opportunity I guess. Sigh.
I said "idiot" outloud and D16 heard me. I can't believe I said that in front of her. I appologized to her and told her he isn't and that I was just frustrated. I've been kicking myself ever since.
So do you want your D's to think that you're a saint? Is it really wrong to let your D's know you are human and that sometimes your H actions bother you?
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I need to find a way to get him involved by consulting with him re: D's.
I think you know this may be futile...but it might help you feel better just to know you have done all that you could to get him involved. IMO, the only thing you really can do is let your H know what is going on with your D's and the rest is up to him. He may eventually get it...or he may not.
Grace- Please don't beat yourself up over that small slip-up in front of your d. You did the right thing by apologizing for it right away and they have to know that you're not a robot. You have feelings and they were hurt, you got angry and said "idiot". He deserved much worse!
