I said to W about my feelings about other men touching the bump, that it is mine and I am uncomfortable with other men touching it. Other women I cant really complain about. But it is not really a man thing to do (I would never dream of touching a womans pregnant stomach, unless it was my W or a relative). I thought about this, because I thought it would take me close to the line. But it was something that I felt strongly about, so I said something. She said ok, didnt respond negativly, think she understands my point. Whether or not she goes along with it or not I dont know (out of sight out of mind). No pressure for a kiss tonight. I did ask if I was getting another night in `our` bed or should I return back to the `other` room (I dont like to call them `your` room and `my` room). She said that she wanted to sleep tight and would prefer to go to sleep alone, but after she gets up during the night (we are like clockwork... so young too, its sad! :)) I can get back into bed with her. She then said that whenever I want, just go and get into the bed. I joked saying that she just needs to get back used to me gradually, maybe in a couple of weeks I can spend a whole night. She laughed. She said she is trying. I reassured her that her pace is fine. I am very concious at the moment to not appear needy, even though I have to say I do feel that way at times.
Anyway, just finished watching the Liverpool game, another classic night at Anfield! If we end up facing Man U in the final, I will have to meet up with Lanzo!
I am listening to alot of David Deida stuff during the days, especially in the afternnons before I finish, as it puts me a good mindset for seeing W. I hope to be able to do some of his exercises with her one day.
W was missing Japanese food again today. We reminised about living in Japan for a while. I think that this will come about.
I just need to find my patience again. Me and W are starting to spend more time together again. Quality time, no fighting or `discussing`. Just fun. That is good. Might try to inject a little romance soon. I used to be sooo romantic when we were dating. As I worked in a school, I had access to lots of craft supplies, so I would often make cards for her. Got quite good. Thinking about going and buying some supplies and trying again (not in a pressuring way) just fun cards. I wanted to send something to her office occasionally. Please dont think I am getting too ahead of myself, I will only go as fast as I see W is willing to accept. I have come to far to mess this up now. W was worried today, she hadnt felt the baby kick today. But she had felt stressed at work, so I told her that I had read that the baby will be affected by different moods. She will learn how the baby reacts in time. Saffie, Ladies? Is this right? W also bought me some childrens books to read to the baby, and I think she will let me read to the bump too. I am allowed to kiss the bump by the way, that is no problem!
Feeling good, was not so good during the day. But I am getting much better at controlling myself.
I think I wont be having a midlife crisis now, as I have had to do alot of self searching now! Might just get the sports car anyway!
Cheers
Steve
PS my W stopped emailing with OM (partly because her laptop was so slow). We speeded up her laptop tonight. Curious to see what happens....
Me 27 W 30 M 2yrs/ T 5yrs Expecting our first child Sept 08 warning bomb (has feelings for someone) 21/12/08 I found out about OM (by snooping) 14/1/08 Living together.
