Thanks so much for your support...it's such a help to have advice and comfort from others who can well relate to what's going on.
I'm having lunch with a good friend today who's aware of the current sitch, but until H actually moves out, it really isn't something that i've shared with much of anyone IRL...except my IC, which I'm resuming next week after a break of about 6 months. It's time to get some more help...
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There is a good chance that he is completely uncertain of what he really wants.
SD, I wish I thought that were the case...i really think H knows all too well what he wants, to be with OW and divorced from me (he has at least told me the part about me a number of times over the last 6 years...) It's the part about being a part-time parent that has stopped him... It's rather telling that he frames it that way...in terms of him, rather than from the loss the boys will experience....
I noticed that H had printed off current info from an condo/apartment building he had looked at last year when he talked about moving out...they are furnished places, either studios or 1 BR. Still $750/mo... yuck...
I've spent some time today working on Fin Aid with one of the colleges S18 really wants to go to... this is a major "as if"...it's what I would be doing if i had no clue about H's latest...so H will have to be the one to say "no" about these better, more costly schools...
...back from lunch with my friend...a good time...she even got me to laugh while imitating how H would (or would not) be able to deal with OW's good bit younger boys!!
It's the part about being a part-time parent that has stopped him... It's rather telling that he frames it that way...in terms of him, rather than from the loss the boys will experience.... 
