I am actually mentally prepared to move on without her if necessary although I would much prefer to be with her. I have been working my butt off to change and feel successful in doing so, and these changes will be maintained no matter what the outcome. Basically, a second chance will be wonderful if it is genuine.
GH,
For the record, I wasn't saying don't take her back and I wasn't saying set conditions for her return, necessarily. I was saying that if she really wants to be with you, that you help her realize what obstacles that you will have to face as a couple, and that includes issues with trust.
If you know you'll be alright without her, then you have nothing to lose by taking her back in and giving this your best shot. The worst that can happen is she'll leave again, but that's not worse than never coming back (is it?). Or I suppose you could discover that she's still contacting OM, at which point you can decide whether you'll work through it, or ask her to go. But, nothing ventured, nothing gained....so give it your best shot.
Some time together would be nice, but make sure she isn't just using you for fun. It sounds like all she wants to do is vacation. Does she have an inclination to work in between? She might have a little growing up to do yet.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
