Please help...need MLC advice

[tpaschal]

Hi there,
first of all you can only worry about things you can change. As far as your H's finances..the courts don't really care. Judges see through the having money and now I am broke routine.

You stood for your M because you wanted to, don't second guess yourself. If your D is going to happen then it is time you start to change you. It is time to really begin to lead your life as if H is not coming back.

Sorry for the pity party! I have up days and down days, and yesterday was a downer. Some days I feel so calm, like I have all the patience in the world, and then I'll just lose it! I'm pretty sure you guys have all gone through that, too, so I know I'm in good company! ;-)

I hope that the judge will consider his past income and base any decisions on that and on his potential future income. There really have been some circumstances beyond his control that have caused his income to go down over the past year, but I do hope they will not buy his "poor me" routine.

I do need to start living as though H will never come back, and I know that is the heart of my problem. I have been living as though H would come back.

There were a lot of reasons for that decision---needing to prove the need for spousal support (which is not mandatory in Texas), trying to keep things as routine and stable for the kids as possible, needing time for myself to cope and adjust because just in general I don't like change and it is very hard for me.

But now what? That's the big question, and that's what scares me because I have no answers.

Thanks for the pep talk.