I have a question for experienced DBers. When my wife came to visit me at the end of last week, she asked me "how has the separation been for you?". Since we were in a public place (a hair salon) I answered that it's best we don't discuss it here but it's a conversation that we can have in the months to come. In truth, I had to fight back tears.
I would like to know if it's worth me telling her how it has been. In truth, it has been the most searing, traumatizing event in my entire life and has affected me profoundly. Should I be telling her this?
She is making a lot of overtures about reconciliation i.e. asking me to plan a trip for the two of us, talking about future plans with her dad, giving me forms for taking her surname into mine, and moving lots of her stuff back into our apartment. All of this is great but I get the impression that if she comes back when she said she would (the weekend), she will want to quickly move on as if nothing has happened whilst I am here absolutely traumatized and shell-shocked.
The other concern of mine is continued contact with OM. True reconciliation cannot begin whilst OM is still in the picture I'm sure - although she has said that there'll be "no need" to continue contact with him, I am aware of just how difficult it will be for her not to.
Not sure what to do here, but I am nevertheless encouraged by the direction things seem to be moving in.
Would be very grateful for any input by experienced DBers.
GH31
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
