The Longest Journey

[NikB]

SD - wow that's great both that you gave it to him and made it so clear (and he even has it in writing if he needs to refer back to it!). I'm glad to hear he's been working harder since that session.

Have you expressed your frustrations to your MC? I'm wondering if it makes sense to bring it up and see what suggestions she (he?) may have. In the few sessions that we had with our MC she realized early on what a "non-talker" my H was and urged me to stay quiet and wait, rather than feeling the need to fill the 'pauses.' That helped some. When he realized we were going to sit there waiting for his reply even if we sat there for an entire hour, he started talking more (and she was able to do it in a way that he didn't feel ganged up on).

I wonder also if it would make sense to go individually for a few sessions? I really liked doing that - some individual and some joint. It seemed to help a bit - when we got to the next joint session the MC could say to H - "remember when we talked about _____" and open up the conversation. Then again all our sessions were leading up to him getting the courage to drop the S bomb, we've never gone when we're actually trying to IMPROVE things, so it may be different. Just wanted to throw the idea out there.

(((SD)))

Hope things are continuing to improve.