-More troubled sleep returned last night, got a late start to my day (11 pm).
-Went to school, practiced the piano, did a "mock piano performance" (FROM MEMORY) for some friends.
-Went to the gym to work out & do a little yoga-- two days in a row!!
-Practiced my cello, but got so frustrated that I started to cry and decided to pack up and go home. I think I am going to talk about my low energy/sleep/motivation/overwhelmed-ness issues tomorrow with my counselor AND my teacher. I just have a huge pile of things to do, I get so overwhelmed that I don't even know where to begin, plus I am a little out of the saddle from being sick and away for so long... I NEED TO RECALIBRATE AND START A POSITIVE PATTERN!!!!!!
Ladies!!! Do not fear, it has only been a week and a half!!! If I can go to yoga this thurs I will try to call him afterwards -- I want to make sure I am in "good happy place" when I call, otherwise I will probably puke on myself. If I can't go to yoga, then, this upcoming weekend, which will only be 2 weeks and 2 days. I will probably need to ask you guys to repeat the advice you have already told me AGAIN, because I am very SCARED AND HESITANT, and I need REASSURANCE ...!!!!!!
One Day, My rock and my role model!! Thank you for encouraging me to make contact. It means so much to me and it is super reassuring to get "permission" from my support group!
Ali, You are so delightful!!! I feel so validated and encouraged by you, and you made me laugh! I really like what you said about it's time to put on the recital! That is totally how musicians think (like us, you awesome Radiohead guitar player) !!
Actually, the boots *are* fluffy on the OUTSIDE... but somehow it manages to work spectacularly!!
cornflower blue fluffy boots Kalni, you are amazing. Thank you so much for your loving prodding. I am going to call him. I am going to call him. You are right. I can create situations to show my changes. Thank you for telling me I have succeeded in working on myself. I still see so many things I want to clean out and improve inside, it means a lot to be reminded that I have made progress!!!
Essie, My darling!! Thank you for the book recommendation!! And I am glad that we can be fluffy-booted together!!! I never would have picked up a title like that without a resounding recommendation from someone I trust, such as yourself! and One day To BOOT! I am kind of burnt out on the relationship reading, I have a stack by my bed of half-finished stuff that I bought from amazon (secrets men keep, five languages of apology, how to improve your marriage without talking about it, four agreements, ETC) but maybe I can put them on the back burner and check out this BITCHIN business!!!!!
Also, to answer your question...There is no attraction with this cello friend. He is secretly dating another cello friend! And WAY too young for me.
OK!!!! Going to fold my laundry and then hopefully SLEEP LIKE A LOG!!
Oh, I wanted to tell you guys... a couple nights ago I hit a really amazing pocket of good vibes inside my heart, and I did a positive visualization for every one of you regular threadreaders, imagining you blissed out with your blissed out WA, hearts and arms open to each other. *Just putting that out there*.
