Hey nocode. I am glad you are writing up these emails but waiting to send them. Very very good for the soul to get everything out, then you can edit as you wish in the future. 48 hour rule is golden, dontcha know?

Quote:
I must keep her guessing or to lull her into complacency.


My only worry about this is when she is confused or angry at you, she isn't complacent by any means. She is downright hostile and hateful and lashes out in the only way that she know will truly hurt you...your sons.

Maybe you can tell her your boundaries: receipts, 1/2 time with sons, etc. But then...this will shock her...ask her what she wants, what will make this more peaceful for her...