Moving here with H and OW

[gForce]

What will you do if you don't act "as if"? Confront H? Act angry and give H a hard time in some way? Play the victim and have H's time with you something he dreads and avoids? Been there, done that. Even bought the t-shirt. These are natural reactions but if you still feel that you want to repair your R/M, and it sound like you do, these will do nothing to get you to that goal. They will push him away from you and towards OW.

While I blame my W's lack of commitment to her attempt at reconciliation as the primary reason for its failure, I also accept the fact that my shortcomings in acting "as if" during that time didn't help us either during that time. It is very hard. Most of the time you won't feel "as if." You will feel like a doormat. You will feel like it isn't fair and you are doing all the work. But it is the best path to take if H is ever going to realize what he gave up for the OW fantasy-R.