Neecy, I do NOT fully trust my wife now. That has to do with the historial propensity for people who cheat to repeat the offense, but mostly it has to do with her lack of movement back towards our marriage and our pre-A issues. Her detailed cellphone billing still comes to me, and I occasionally check her phone for text messages. Other than the one relapse last year, which she came to me and self-admitted after about five days of re-contact, there has been no other re-contact that I'm aware of.
I know people have done this successfully. I'm just not seeing my wife's actions and efforts as being in congruent with someone who's going to make a go of it, but that's another story.
btw, I skipped over your "actions, not words" thing, and you are RIGHT and I was WRONG. (there, I said it, LOL). You are wise to focus on his ACTIONS.
He does act like Saddam Hussein, though, ACTING as if he has WMDs, even at the threat of his own destruction, which I just find WEIRD.
