I have been a bit blue of late. So many things weighing me down. My job. This head cold. This yucky weather. Lack of sleep. And my father is not doing all that well -- he's in ICU.
And then I keep trying to not let my W bring me down, not think about her so much. And she is still so cold and hostile. I went to another parent-teacher meeting late this afternoon. W was relatively polite, but she still treats me like I am some imbecile when it comes to the education plan our S7 is on.
I fear that Flynn and Root are right. W's accusations are more than annoying and a nuisance -- they're starting to bug me. And while I don't gather from my S's that they feel any real difference towards me, I am beginning to wonder how much I may really not know that W is saying to them.
The other thing that gives me concern is that W contracted a husband and wife team to paint and repair the interior of our house, in preparation for putting it on the market. While I approve of W hiring the contractor and setting the schedule around which they can work, especially since she is still living in the house, she did not consult with me before making the decision on who to hire (she has gotten really awful about that, making decisions on her own, most often unilateral, even when she should consult with me first.) W has put the expenses on her credit card. She has expected the federal tax refund check to help pay for this cost. I have told W I want a detailed bill for time and materials from the contractor, for tax purposes among many other reasons.
I filed our joint return this year and she got the checks when they were mailed to our residence. I now believe that I may have made a foolish mistake in entrusting my W by endorsing the refund checks for her to pay off the credit card debt for the house repairs. I realize that my W, who has always tried to pass herself off as fiscally sound and responsible, might be "embezzling" money's out of me under the pretense of home improvement expenses. She could very well be building a secret nest egg, if she hasn't already, to fund a court battle with me, to take the kids away from me -- and I would have inadvertently provided her the funds to do so.
I have a bad feeling about this. I just don't want to believe that my W would be that cold-blooded, but then again how can I say I even know who this person is any longer? She has sunk pretty low already -- how much farther could she or would she descend?
