I'm blowing the dust off my thread again ... I hope I don't cause anyone to sneeze!
Had a bad trigger this week ... H went out out town, just one night. But he has not done that for a couple of months. He's avoided it for my sake. He gave me his entire schedule, and I heard him talking to his office on the phone about it so I know he was not with OW (especially since he was 3 hrs away). But I sort of freaked when I called him around 9:30 p.m. and got dumped immediately into his voicemail! When he was with OW, he would turn his phone off at times, and when I tried to reach him, that's what I would get.
And another challenge this weekend, going camping with my Scout troop. The last time we went he was in the throes of the A. He is usually there most of the weekend every time we camp. But the last time he didn't even stay for the big campfire/s'mores, etc., on Saturday night. Claimed he was exhausted. I know now he went to spend the night with OW. Then the next day, he was late in getting back to camp (and he was bringing the bacon to fry for breakfast). A$$hole.
We're only 25 min from the camp so I'm sure he won't stay overnight (he usually doesn't), but it makes me nervous.
I almost moved to piecing this week but I'm scared! I had a new post ready to go, typed it up, walked away from it, came back, edited it, walked away again ... then came back and deleted it. I'm such a wuss. I haven't gone through near the sh!t that some of you have gone through!
I have noticed some of us are coming up on the start of our year 'anniversaries'. The bomb, certain dates, certain yearly events, these are all hard to face. Triggers can be so hard. We remember how vulnerable (and sometimes, blind, in my case) we were and it scares us. I think what you are going through is so very normal. It doesn't help that the phone went straight to VM, but maybe he doesn't have service at the moment.
I trust your H isn't doing anything. I hope he stays most of the time during the camping trip.
You poor thing, struggling with moving to piecing. I think you 'qualified' for piecing months ago, but I understand your hesitation. I am thinking of you.
Just wanted to write a little somthing not even sure what to say. I hope you have a great weekend and that you hear from your H soon so that you can relax a little and enjoy the rest of your evening. I'm sure it's nothing but I can DEFINATELY see myself thinking the same thing. Sounds like you two have come along way and he is being very transparent with you so keep your head up high. You have been such an inspiration to me and so helpful. It's nice to know there are people that have been where I am at, that know how i feel, can relate and even offer good advise. I cant thank you enough for helping me though the hardest time of my life.
Hope you have fun camping and stay warm! (I'm in MI lol) good luck
LWB, I can't believe it's almost been a year. Seems like only yesterday. I still vividly remember the raw pain from those first couple of months. They say you don't remember physical pain but as far as mental and emotional pain? I don't think you can forget ... forgive maybe, but not forget.
HM, H is home. Got home yesterday. It was only an overnight trip. The camping trip will be great GAL. We always have a great time. My sister is my co-leader and we go to the same camp we went to as Scouts so it's full of warm, fun memories.
I hope we do ok weather wise -- especially at night. Not too worried about the daytime. Should be in the high 50s tomorrow night, but Saturday it's supposed to get into the low 40s ... burr.
I *THINK* I can hold my head up high, good point. Thank you!
I think everyone on this board should be awarded an honorary degree in therapy! Seriously. What would we do without each other?
I *THINK* I can hold my head up high, good point. Thank you!
I think everyone on this board should be awarded an honorary degree in therapy! Seriously. What would we do without each other?
Joie
You definitely need to hold your head up high Joie, you have given me (and others here) so much help I am very grateful!!! And I agree about the degree in therapy. I usually find that my C gives me advice that I have already been given here!!! Karen
We're only 25 min from the camp so I'm sure he won't stay overnight (he usually doesn't), but it makes me nervous.
Joie,
I hear ya, my son and I go "Camping for a week up in Eureka. Play in the sand dunes and build sand castles.... I am also "Nervous". we have to plan way ahead so it does give W plenty of time to send the OM airplane tickets...
Originally Posted By: JoieDeVivre
I almost moved to piecing this week but I'm scared! I had a new post ready to go, typed it up, walked away from it, came back, edited it, walked away again ... then came back and deleted it. I'm such a wuss. I haven't gone through near the sh!t that some of you have gone through!
Joie
Piecing is a state of mind.... Go for it
Dr Love
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
THanks for the suggested books...I'm afraid things are taking a turn for the worse in my sitch, so not so sure whether they are applicable anymore or not.
Can't sleep, so I read through this thread... sounds like H is engaging in some positive behaviors meant to reassure you...that is great!
WE'll follow you (in spirit and posting to you) to Piecing! You sound ready...
Me: 42/H: 37 T: 10 years/M: 8 D9, S8 Bomb: 7.23.07 Separated: 1.20.08 D Final 3.19.09 Affair started in '05, found out parts in 11/07. They married 11.26.09
Karen