Please help...need MLC advice

[tpaschal]

So, now I have a question about NC. I've been fairly dim, only contacting him about kids or bills, and even then I've not been going out of my way to make contact---trying to save up issues for when he's going to be over for the kids anyway. And I've gotten to where I text him instead of calling, because he doesn't seem to want to talk to me and often lets the phone go to voice mail if I call.

But I've been pretty laid-back about visitation schedule, etc. Letting him come hang out at the house with the kids on Thursday afternoons instead of taking them to his apt. or somewhere else. Letting him bring the kids home early on Sunday evenings, etc.

I've been trying to be accommodating instead of firm, because he uses that to say I'm being b*tchy. I also was using it as a 180, because I was very controlling in the past. I was hoping that being dim but friendly would make him feel less pressured and more drawn toward home. Doesn't seem to have helped. He's still digging further and further into his tunnel.

Also have not allowed my attorney to get aggressive. (It's more expensive to go that route, anwyay.)

So, now what? What can/should I do differently? Any suggestions?