So I saw her yesterday. I was going to go into a store when I realized the might be her car parked outside. As I got back in my car to leave, I saw her. It took everything I had not to go up to her. My heart was beating so fast, I wouldn't have known what to say. It was so frustrating to see my wife. A girl I had known so closely yet am now so far away from. She looked beautiful still. I feel like I was set back 10 steps. I don't know how someone could act like everything was normal when they hurt someone so much. I would treat a person I met once better than she did in a multiyear marriage.
Is it too hopeful to think she will come around? I pray everyday that God will mold her into the woman I once knew who had faults but loved Him and me. More importantly though, I pray for her soul. Being married, the goal is to help each other to heaven. In a way, she has helped me change into the man God wants me to be. I hope that He will do the same for her. Without contact, all I can do is pray.
