On a more secular observation, I would say that the OW is threatened by you and the relationship you have with your children. She probably is very cognizant of the ties between you and your H and sees you as a threat to her R with your H. I can imagine that she sees the children as what binds the two of you (your H and you) together so by acting close to the children, she thinks she can become a second mom to them.
Before that causes the fire to boil inside of you, understand that she can never replace you as the childrens' mom and will only create anger from the children if she oversteps too far. Your H may be supporting her attempts to win the children over for different reasons. He is probably not trying to get her to be a replacement for you as the childrens mom but is trying to get the children to embrace her as a way to receive approval for his choice.
You see H wants to have a merry-happy-life and that includes his kids, because he loves them. And yes he wants ow to be part of the party. Yes I do find ow to be controlling of the situation by trying to wurm her way into the kid's life by being exceptionally sweet...something she did to get H too ! I hate that he does not see that. But I accept that he just can't.
Thanks so much for the quotes, you are my angel ! I love you lots and my prayers are with you and your family too !
I am looking for that ray of light....hoping it will shine just around the corner for me.
For now, yes, I will have minimun contact again. I want that now and I really can't bring myself to be friends under these circumstances. Time will have to pass some. I'm doing much better with little to no contact. I really love my life, it's just the little things that hurt you know.
This morning all the kids brought me breakfast and crawled into bed with me, as we lay there cuddling and munching away, my D7 said, "mommy, you have breasts, ow does too ! She is 25 and you are 35" I felt intruded once again, by my little angel who just didn't mean to say anything remotely hurtful. It is so sad, that these kids are taught by this society that life goes on, and marriages just don't last. That it's no problem when one parent goes off to be happy with someone else. It's so sad.
I plan on praying more, listening better and living to the fullest.
There are much worse things than this in life...
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
