I think his lack of sharing is both gender and introversion related. He often seems amused (okay, sometimes irritated) that I need to talk about things, sometimes over and over before I get them resolved. He's not that way. And he's adamantly opposed to IC. I think in the same way that he doesn't feel the need to share with me, he doesn't think he needs to open up to a stranger to work through his issues. In a way, I can wrap my head around that one. On the other hand, I think: if you're hurt, go find someone who can help fix your problem! But that's me.
A few months ago, we received a forwarded email video of a comedian (can't remember his name) who talks about how men operate...how guys have their heads all compartmentalized into boxes, and that their favorite box to hang out in is the 'nothing' box. H loved it, and often will just say that's where he is. I get it (as much as I can from my perspective, I guess)...but I do worry that the 'nothing' box is an excuse for avoiding working on a real problem. Hope that made sense.
I like what you said about working on being a safe person to be verbally intimate with. I'll put some thought into how I can work on being safer...any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
