So, let me tell a story about when I texted OW. H met OW while doing a play. Something he had recently gotten into (was actually pushed by me because I knew he wanted to do it) and she always helped out at the plays. She is a dj at a radio station. H was about to get out of the AF, so she said she could get him a job at the radio station. At first I was so excited for H because it seemed like something he really wanted to do. That is right around the time his attitude changed and they started talking all the time. So anyway, after a voicemail that I heard from her I sent her a text. H knew I sent it, he was in the room when I did it.
So the next day he didn't come home from work. I found out he was at the radio station. I asked him what he was doing there and he said he went by to find out about the job because they hadn't called him like they said they would. Well, he said that they didn't call because they weren't going to give him the job anymore. He said OW had shown the text (to her personal phone) to her boss. Her boss said they wouldn't hire him because they didn't want any "drama" from me. That is when OW told H that I was crazy and she wouldn't be interested in him anyway because she was a lesbian.
Well, rather than get mad at OW because she showed it to her boss (which who knows if she really even did)...he was furious at me for ruining his opportunity. Rather than get mad at himself for having an inapppropriate relationship with this woman...it was all my fault. I was crazy for even thinking anything was going on (BTW, by the date on the picture it was going on by then)....seems I am not so crazy afterall. Although, now I can't even imagine if he had gotten that job...I don't really think he would be here right now.
I guess it is no real surprise that he lied...doesn't make it hurt any less. He was so convincing. I even remember our MC having me tell her every reason that I thought he was having an affair. Then she said she had me do that just to make sure she wasn't missing anything. She had seen my H and I both individually and together. She said "I have been doing this a long time, and unless he is a REALLY good liar...which I doubt...there is nothing going on with those two. It is inappropriate, but I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that it isn't physical." When this statement was made he was already living with her and I had no clue.
I even remember him saying "At this point it would be easier for me to lie to you and tell you something was going on just to get you off my back about it." Anyway, enough about that. I guess my point is that if I contact her I will come out looking like the crazy one. I won't let her have that power over me.
ANYWAY.....so yesterday I called H when I knew he would be at work and told him I was just going to drop a check by his apt. for the rent (BTW, that is the last time I will help him financially, he should be able to do it on his on from now on). That way I didn't have to see him or talk to him because I don't really feel like doing either right now. Well, he called me to thank me. Then he talked a little bit, told me about his day and just chit chatted a little. Then he started talking about being hungry and wanting to go eat. That is when I usually say "want to go get something to eat?" and we go out. I didn't say anything this time. If he wants to hang out with me then he is going to have to be the one to ask.
I will not contact him now. I will give him his space and let him be an adult.
Whew! Sorry for the ramble, I guess I had to do a little journaling too!
