I think it might be time........

[Mom of 2 Cherubs]

Thank you to everyone for all of your advice and kind words. It is very refreshing to see the helpful supportive side of all of you considering how crazy i have been towards HFF.

Hope - i do want to find that happiness within myself. I think that what i need is a break to find that. i have always done what others expected, wanted, etc. I have never really been myself.

HFF and i just had a really good conversation about ALL of this. I feel better, i think he does too. I still believe that taking a break will do us both some good. Like i said before, if we then reconcile and are married for 30 more years, then this will just be blip in time. If i don't do it and we end up in the same situation 1 year from now, I will kick myself for not doing it now.

This is going to sound very bizarre i know - if there ever was a time, this is it. It wouldn't be because i am leaving for the OM, HFF is not furious with me, he understands (though doesn't necessarily agree with) where i am coming from. If it is going to happen, then now is the time to do it.

This is hard to explain but i feel if i don't do it now under these seemingly "ok" situations (not really ok but not at all volatile) i will always think - what if.