Good luck on the audition tonight! Hope you rock the place and have a good time. Sounds like your W. is quite intrigued and interested. You da man. Let us know how is went!
Audition went pretty well, though surprisingly I felt a bit nervous. Did 10 songs with the band, finished up with 2 huge rockers "Hurts So Good" (Mellencamp) and "No Matter What" (Badfinger). I was awesome on those two especially!!
I called W as I drove home, ended up talking to her for the whole drive (15 minutes).
She started a very intense course today, a career shift for her...so I surprised her with a bouquet of spring flowers, delivered to "her" place just after she got home. She was really pleased and quite surprised. They were not meant to be romantic, just wishing her good luck in her studies over the next 6 months.
She said "wow. I never bought you anything for your audition!" I said, that's OK, you can give me a foot rub next week. "Deal!" she said.
No expectations, just enjoying the present moment. What a great night. Rock and ROLL!
sweet ride MM!! speaking as a old farm boy those jeep are tanks. also its realy awsome you are doing the music thing. i play bagpipes and i thing i might try to gind lrssons in the area to bone up and do some paraded this summer. i also do highland games so this will be something i realy enjoy
MM i just want to say thanks. when ever im down you have very good incite. i also look to your post to see how to act when im feeling lost.
I spent a nice evening with W and her friend tonight (she invited me over)...just a couple glasses of wine, nice music and stimulating conversation.
She sat beside me on the couch, and rested her leg over mine while we all talked. There was a time not too long ago, that I took that for granted. Not now. I just rested my hand on her foot. It felt nice to be casually connected like that.
I was happy to see the flowers I sent her, displayed front and centre on the dining room table
Two hugs and 3-4 kisses when I left...she thanked me for spending the evening with them.
Not much to report tonight - she has been in a course Fri-Sat-Sun, so I've had limited interaction with her, other than spending a couple nice hours with her and her friend (from out of town) last night.
However, I sent her a quick text tonight after she finished, "hope this weekend doesn't make you too tired at work tomorrow"
She called me immediately and said "thank you so much for the text, that was nice".
We then talked for about 15 minutes. She was in a really good mood, and we shared a lot (no R talk though).
At the end, I slipped up...I said, "this is nice - I love talking to you" She said "yes, it is very nice MM, I love talking to you too." Then I said "I miss you". Oops! It was like I couldn't stop myself.
She seemed fine...but I wish I hadn't said it. Oh well, what are you gonna do??
The next thing for us is a California Wine Festival on Wednesday. Should be fun!
I have an overwhelming urge to call her today....it's so hard not to!
Despite my emotional mind telling me that it will help, by letting her know that I am here - my logical mind is telling me that if she desired contact, she would reach out herself.
Don't know why I'm feeling this way. Part of the normal ups and downs, I hope.
I am seeing her day after tomorrow, when we have a nice dinner/event planned. Why is it so hard to wait until then?
As I said earlier - the sense of detachment comes and goes in its intensity.
It's hard because you love her, you're not in control and you know you shouldn't. Keep strong.
Me: 42/H: 37 T: 10 years/M: 8 D9, S8 Bomb: 7.23.07 Separated: 1.20.08 D Final 3.19.09 Affair started in '05, found out parts in 11/07. They married 11.26.09
