Detachment is all the time. And not just during the crisis, but during piecing and reconciliation and recommitment and happiness. It's about not letting her stress and anger make you stressed and angry. It's about being able to be the nice happy guy around her even if she is having a bad day or pushing your buttons. It's about realizing that they are her problems/issues/emotions, not yours.
What you are talking about is cutting back on the contact. Going gray or dark. Which sounds like a good plan. She needs some time to sort herself out.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2