It is an interesting adjustment because though we've functioned as a family through this whole ordeal, we haven't. And I've had to set aside my expectations of there being some mutuality to our R. Now I have these expectations - I need some tenderness, a kiss (blown or otherwise) before heading out the door or off to bed, and I feel entitled to it, resentful when I feel rejected because affection isn't returned. We briefly did this when W told me she wanted to try. Now she's backed off and has been shying away from any advances I make in this area. I've consciously backed off in response, but every once in a while make some bid that hasn't been returned. This isn't to say that she hasn't been making her own efforts to be closer. She's been much more friendly with me. I know I need to back off more, especially since nothing has been set in stone and we havn't agreed on anything at all yet.
I guess I need to be patient, but I also think I need some limits, goals and the like. I'm torn between working to get the M to a better place and doing nothing and leaving it up to the W to do what she's comfortable with. Meanwhile I'm working on me.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
