We still share a room and same bed yes. Final we are no more was only last Thursday although W says she's told me plenty of times, though nothing really ever come of it. I felt we were moving forward after a bad Nov/Dec after a nice NYE out together and we had started having a little giggle together at home and things seemed to be moving forward.
W has said she wants to have more fun and go clubbing etc, which I always encouraged her to do, but she was always to tired. Then in Late January I woke at 5am and she had not come home, so I was worried sick. Mobile wasn't answered so I text, then tried again and she eventually rang back 10 mins later in a cab. Now that made me suspicious as did her stories so I checked her mobile in the morning and there were text from a new number, which was obviously a bloke a from the night before, so I gave her every opportunity to come clean and she didn't, but a few days later after speaking with friends and getting as much info as I could and her actions I just came clean and she had gone back with a man but no more than kissing happened as it felt weird.
Been up and down since then, but my paranoia and her lack of effort since given that we were supposed to be making and effort, make me start snooping. I then found she'd looked the guy up on computer and his GF and had his number on her phone again, under a different name. She was not happy with my snooping and doesn't seem to understand why I was doing it.
Me staying is not just her decision no, it wasn't like that. I want to be there TBH, certainly at the moment as 2 holidays coming up (which I know will be real difficult).
Silly things though, she is still wearing her wedding and engagement rings (I don't have a ring) and she has talked about be being there 'until the kids are older' which seems odd to me. Am I right to assume there must be some love still there for her to not want me out of the way ? or is it more selfish reasons from her ? (that I am being blind too)
All responses appreciated.
Oh, couldn't get book just now from shops, will have to order to my mums house as don't want W to know what I'm up to at the moment.
