Had a good visit with my friend. She is great...very supportive and understanding. It was helpful because I checked some things out with her to get her perspective and she is the kind of good friend who would challenge some of my thinking about things. She validated a lot of the stuff I was experiencing so that made me feel a little more normal. I've been so confused and distraught at times that I feel "crazy".
With reluctance, I went out to a few open houses. I can't believe how familiar it felt--we bought our home only about 1.5 years ago. It is stressful to look for a home even when you are excited about it. It is rather awful to be looking at places when you don't want to move. Anyway, my goal was to try it out and get some beginning info. I just felt upset afterwards about how much disruption this whole thing has caused in my life. It is hard to see positives to look forward to. I know that's where I am at this moment and it will probably change. But right now, honestly the thought of all the change involved in my life with buying a new place, separating our stuff, etc. just feels like too much that I don't want. I'm frustrated!
Okay, I feel a little better now. Make some tea and go breathe.
