Happy, yes, luckily, I know that I am taking hormones that are depleting my estrogen level...leaving only testosterone! So, I get very testy and moody and aggressive sometimes...so, I come here, vent...then after a while...it is usually over.
However, even when I am okay, these thoughts come into my head too...but I can be calm about my reactions...
Sorry ACJ if it seems like I bit your head off...not my intention, really.
I DO thank my H for the great job he is doing...I do that often...not because it is good DBing but because I really AM thankful that he is not all over the place with OUR money. I KNOW it could be infinitely worse.
I am not sure what would be a 180 for me regarding this point. I mean, I praise him for the work on the finances...I praise him for things that go great at his job...I praise him for his looks, I praise him for a lot of sh*t---even when I don't feel like it. Personally, I don't how much more praising I can do...
I am sure that there are 180's to be done----I just don't know what they are...I am SURE you would hear a different version from my H...but I am not going to be a carpet for him(which I am beginning to feel like I am becoming) and I really think that is what he wants---a carpet...I think this because I don't think he is near to being done...
So, I am just going to try to remain still and not let my emotions get all over the place...
Can hardly wait for my surgery and no more freaking hormones that make me crazy...
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
Always, wait to see you either...I feel all alone here and people around me are NOT helping.
I still have anger and it is coming out...depite the fact that I am on AD's....jut think it is the Lupron for my endometriosis...makes me feel like I can kick anybody's ass at the drop of a hat...
Crazy.
Okay, so I am being productive today...
MLM has gone to DC on some business trip and I am pretty certain I won't hear from him until he comes back...so several days of peace...
I am also hooked on HGTV and want to by a router (saw)...to do all sorts of stuff...did I ever mention I like power tools?
it will be great to help you set up your house!!!!
((((((((((((((Always)))))))))))))))))))
thank you for "always" being there for me...you are my lifesaver....
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
-finish grad school -pay off credit cards -visit my friends/travel with friends
So those are just a few...jinkies, do I feel good already!
thank you/Lissett/Baseball Annie for being there to talk me out of my blue moods...to tell me that I am loved...to believe that the future is bright...I really do not know how I could do this without you all...
Love you all more than words can say...
V
Last edited by Valentine; 03/31/0804:10 AM.
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
Hi Vali- Just thought I would stop by and check in on you.
Great 180's...okay, now I need to come up with some myself...hmmm! I may have to copy you on the travel. Finding new adventures would be another...I am thinking of signing up for sailing lessons. I'll keep thinking!
My weekend was okay...a little weird and has left me in a bad mood, but I have a lot to think about...
I think if I put boundaries I might feel less angry and more in control of my situation at least in how it pertains to me.
I think I really need to GAL and not answer my H's calls...I think I am too available for him. It has not changed anything in our sitch for me to be available to him...he has not come closer or talked about our R...and I have been available for months.
So, I have to conclude that he is not interested in moving closer or whatever...so I think I am going to continue walking along my own path...
Hope your weekend was better than mine...
V
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
