Please help...need MLC advice

[tpaschal]

Snodderly,

Thanks for checking in on my thread. I appreciate your insights and suggestions.

The kids and I were in counseling from Jan. 07, shortly after the bomb drop, until October 07, when H quit paying. This is the first time he's ever agreed to go, so I guess I was hoping he was peeking out of the tunnel just a bit.

I guess I had hoped that after a year of him being gone, some of the anger would be dissipating by now. But it seems to come and go, and I can never predict it.

I am dim, only contacting him when necessary about kids stuff or bills needing to be paid, but when I do see him at soccer games or when he comes to pick up the kids (he also comes on Thursdays and hangs out around the house for a couple of hours) I try my darndest to act "as if." But one minute we'll be having a normal conversation about something and the next minute he'll clam up, not talk, and be very obvious in not being able to wait to get away from me.

At the Temporary Orders Hearing two weeks ago he seemed frustrated, not angry, and we actually got along decently. Not friendly, exactly, but at least having civil and normal conversations.

So I was just thrown a little by the return to anger.

The kids' counselor (who is in the same practice with the C we have an appt. with, and recommended him) said that the C would likely start off by asking what our expectations were, what we hoped to get out of the counseling.

Should I be honest and say I still want to save my M? (H is still pushing for a D, had his L send a letter to my L asking for a late April or early May court date.) Or should I just say I want to improve communication for the kids' sake?

I don't want to lie, but I don't want to come across as too pursuing, either.