Hi everyone! I got back from my trip last night and had a great time with S.
A lot has happened since my last post. I will try to catch up on everyone's sitch as soon as I get a chance. Easter dinner went well - H was more like his old self (warm and friendly). I noticed that when he came over for dinner, he brought his overnight bag and ended up staying the night. I went to bed and then a while later he came to lie down next to me in bed. I initiated ML and he responded although he was emotionally distant. After ML he asked me how I was and I said that I was OK. He said he didn't want to hurt me and I replied "I know". He said he shouldn't do this again until he makes some definitive decisions and I responded that I know he's conflicted about a lot of things. The next morning he saw S and I off on our trip and gave me a hug.
I called H after we arrived to let him know that we had arrived safely (he was worried due to the terrible weather conditions) and I very excitedly told him some of the things we had done. The next day I received 2 emails from him but I only responded over 24 hours later by email and I was very upbeat. H sent me another 4 emails over the next couple of days (2 were "business" related), called my cell twice to ask me when we would be arriving and that he could pick us up. I responded only once. He picked us up yesterday evening, stayed for a while and then had to go back to work for a while to get some things he had left there. He gave me a hug before he left and we said goodnight.
An hour later he calls me from work and asks if he can come by to speak to me. I was reading in bed when he arrived. Soon afterwards, I notice he has his pyjamas on and sits on our bed talking about work. His contract will be over soon and he doesn't know what he'll be doing after that. He's decided to apply for a position in another city and doesn't know how that will affect our family. I didn't say much, mainly listened and validated from time to time. We both went to sleep, no physical touching. This morning we got up, had breakfast and then he left - no hug, no kiss. I really don't know what to make of all of this. I know he is still seeing OW although I sense it has died down somewhat. I think H is trying to determine what R he wants to pursue. What do I do??? I don't want to be taken advantage of (be a doormat whenever he feels like spending time with me). Do I bring this up with H? How do I set boundaries without pushing him further away? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz