I just want to make it better. . .

[seekpeaceofmind]

Talked w/ C yesterday. Told her I feel stuck. She said that is to be expected under my circumstances where there is a high level of ambiguity and H is so indirect and not forthcoming. She said a sitch like mine is unusual in her exp - no active conflict or process for resolution or change. We really are not moving in any direction, just this limbo state and I am in the dark about what is going on w/ H. As we were talking, I was thinking that this seems normal to me, but only b/c I see that there are others in DB mode with this same experience. But, it seems that we are the exception and not the rule.

Another way of looking at it is, look for the worst (i know it's not a word, but cant remember the correct saying)and you'll get it.

You are right about that - it's one of my frustrations that I can't get into a more positive mindset. I feel like I am feeding my own unhappiness, but I don't have enough strength to push it away. I need a Wonder Woman amulet or something. . . .

Do you get out a bit Seek? what hobbies/interests do you have?

I don't have a real active social life, but I am working on it. I do get out to spend time with friends - meet for lunch or movies, that kind of thing. I have made a couple of new friends, too. My friends are kind of spread around geographically, so it's not a quick/simple thing to get together.
I'm not very well-rounded in the hobby category. It's something that I'm missing and I'm trying to find a creative outlet that will hold my attention and be something that I can do easily and as an "everyday" activity. A lot of the things I enjoy doing are "events" - go to see a play, travel to Montreal or Boston for an art exhibit, that kind of thing. I used to lose myself in a good book, but that holds less interest for me now. . . .