Strong like Marshmallow

[minkerman]

H - the house is a mess, the bills aren't paid, you get lost on the internet, your weight makes you unattractive to me.

I really don't mean to be blunt, but how much of this is true? My DB coach says that every time my W talks to me about the relationship, she is telling me how to get through to her.

So, what have you done for YOU...that will have the side benefit of getting H's attention?

If what he says above is actually the case, wouldn't he be rocked if suddenly the house was spotless all the time, you got a pastime other than surfing the internet, and you started going to a gym and got into killer shape? Not just a 180, but a triple 180.

I'm sorry you're in this spot...25 years is a large time investment. I'm at 28 years, and my W and I have been through much of what you have with family issues, deaths, work, etc.

There is no white and black when it comes to DBing. It is always shades of grey. You need to try something and see if it works, then the next day try something else - always monitoring results.

Good luck, Gypsy - and don't give up!